Dealing with Divorce at Work

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

When going through or dealing with the aftermath of a divorce those affected may attempt to keep the other segments of their life as normal as possible. In many cases, this means trying to prevent the emotion and anxiety of the divorce from seeping into and impacting one’s work. It is not always easy, but maintaining a steady and consistent work environment can help a person get through their divorce.

Getting Through the Work Day

The stress of your marriage breaking up can have a negative effect on your work performance. You can do everything in your power to keep things on an even keel, but here are a few ideas to help you maintain good productivity at work.

1. Let your boss know what is happening. It would be okay to have a private conversation with your supervisor to let him or her know that is going on with your marriage. Ask for some flexibility when it comes to meeting with your attorney.

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Bad Divorce Advice

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

When considering a divorce, or while you are going through this highly emotional and stressful experience, perhaps the last thing anyone wants to hear is a lot of advice about how to handle the whole process. A divorce is a very personal matter. It would be rare that any two divorces are exactly alike, so it is unlikely that advice from one will fit the needs of another.

Do What is Best for You

No one knows or understands your marriage experience better than you, so applying the advice of others to a very personal matter, such as a divorce, may prove to be quite counterproductive. Here is a sample of some advice that might be right for some, but could be considered quite bad depending on an individual’s circumstances. If you hear this advice from friends or family, proceed with caution.

• Separate as soon as possible and cut off all contact. Not only will this create an adversarial relationship with your spouse, but also could negatively impact your relationship with your children.

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Dividing Friends in Divorce

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

When married couples divorce it is not uncommon for possessions accumulated during the marriage to become subject to division. In addition to cars, homes, accumulated wealth and even time with children, it may happen that even the friends you had during your marriage may suddenly no longer answer your phone calls.

Time for New Social Circles

Even those people who you thought were your best friends may no longer have time for you, or perhaps even took the side of your ex-spouse following a divorce. While that can be unsettling, this time in your life can become an opportunity for finding and making new friends. This will not always be easy, especially if your former spouse was the one in the relationship who initiated the friendships you maintained as a couple. However, now you have the chance to surround yourself with the type of people with whom you truly enjoy spending time.

• Take time to determine what it is you want to get out of a new friendship. Since you no longer have a spouse to consider, there may be an opportunity to get to know people with whom your ex-spouse might not have otherwise associated.

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Life after Divorce: Dealing with Bad Memories during and after a Divorce

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

Married couples have a lifetime of happy memories from their time together. Divorced couples may have shared some good times together, but when a divorce appears on the horizon the good times often fade and one’s thoughts can be dominated by the memories that led up to or caused the divorce. Sometimes the weight of those bad memories can create problems that affect other areas of one’s life.

Coping Strategies

For people who feel overwhelmed by the bad memories of a failed marriage, simply telling oneself to stop dwelling on the past is not enough. Whether it is self-guilt over the divorce or the memories of words and actions by the ex-spouse, it can require more than willpower to stop reliving the past. Although not a complete list of strategies, the following are some tips that may help.

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Divorce and Depression

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

In addition to the financial repercussions of divorce, the emotional toll felt by both adults and children during and following the end of a marriage often has the power to develop into something quite harmful. In fact, many professionals urge greater awareness for and detection of the signs of clinical depression among those who go through a divorce.

Teens and Divorce

The impact of divorce on a teen can have a number of negative effects, ranging from feelings of abandonment to blaming themselves for the split of their parents. Some professionals make the analogy of a puzzle with missing parts, now the picture of the family the teen has known their whole life is suddenly incomplete. This can lead to confusion and sadness that, if left untreated, has the ability to develop into something quite harmful.

Although the numbers do not all reflect the impact of divorce, the incidents of teen depression have been on the rise since 2012. However, many believe increased cases of teen depression can often be traced back to some kind of major change in a teen’s life. The divorce of their parent certainly would qualify as a major life-changing event.

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Stages of Recovery after Divorce

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

Although most studies show that divorces occur most frequently during the first 10 years of a marriage, even couples who were married 25 years and longer may still find their relationship ending while seated across the table from one another in a lawyer’s office. Regardless of the circumstances, recovering from a divorce often requires time and understanding.

Recovering from a Divorce Is a Process

The emotional attachment to one’s spouse is a strong thing, and not easily dismissed. It is not surprising that those who go through a divorce may experience a period similar to that of grieving the loss of a loved one during the months after a divorce is final.

Denial

This typically occurs in the person who did not initiate the divorce. They do not want to believe that the person they love no longer wants to spend the rest of their life with them. A person in denial may harbor hopes for reconciliation, even when it is clear the marriage is over.

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Ways to Cope with Separation and Divorce

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

For many people, divorce is one of the most emotionally demanding and stressful situations they will go through. Not only do you have to deal with the long and demanding legal divorce process, but you also have to figure out how to cope with the fact that you are ending a major relationship in your life, which can bring about a myriad of emotions. In order to come out of the divorce right side up, you have to figure out how to cope with these emotions and work your way through this emotional process.

Allow Yourself to Grieve the Loss of the Relationship

If you are going through a divorce, one feeling you will probably come across is grief. Grief is a natural response to the loss of something, in this situation, the loss of your relationship. It is important that you allow yourself to feel the emotions that come with grief, such as anger, sadness, fear, and confusion. The sooner you can emotionally accept that the relationship is over, the sooner you can begin your process of self-healing.

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Exploring Ways to Cope with Emotions During and After a Divorce

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

Though you never planned for it, a divorce can be one of the biggest events in your life. You are changing your entire life when you divorce, from where you live to which bank account you use. A divorce is very much a legal process, but it is also more than that - it is an emotional process that you must go through as well. Emotional coping is very important when you are going through a divorce and is essential to your mental health once you have completed the legal aspect of divorce. Here are some ways to help you cope with the wild emotions that divorce can bring:

Allow Yourself to Grieve

Though divorce is a legal process, it is just as much an emotional one. It is only natural to grieve the loss of your relationship when you are going through a divorce, and to prevent yourself from grieving will only prolong the process. Allowing yourself to go through the stages of grief is a healthy coping mechanism that will enable you to move on with your life.

Take Care of Yourself

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Dealing with the Emotional Impact of Divorce

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

No matter the length of the marriage and no matter the circumstances of the split, a divorce is always a difficult life event to get through. Even the most steadfast and strong person can experience the challenges that a divorce brings. Because of the all-encompassing nature of divorce, it can feel like your entire life is falling apart, especially right after your divorce is finalized. While you are most likely experiencing major changes after your divorce, it is important to realize that these changes are only temporarily distressing and with time, you will become happier and healthier. Here are a few tips as to how you can move on after your divorce:

Learn to Let Go of Your Negative Emotions

Though it will be difficult, you cannot health without first learning to let go of all of the negativity and stress that you have built up throughout your marriage and divorce. You may be experiencing feelings of anger, sadness, hopelessness or despair, but they will do nothing but damage for you. You must learn to look past those emotions and understand that they do go away with time.

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Divorce and New Year’s Resolutions

 Posted on December 00, 0000 in Life After Divorce

We all know how most New Year’s resolutions work -- you come up with grandiose ideas about how you will change and be different, you follow them for about a month and then you go back to your same old routines. While keeping resolutions can be difficult, there is no better time to take a look at your life and do a little introspection and self-reflection than the beginning of a new year, especially if you are recently divorced or you are looking to begin the divorce process. Divorces can be messy and difficult, but keep these few New Year’s resolutions in mind and you could come out of your divorce on top. Let Go of Your Anger and Make a Point to Be Happy A divorce can cause you to feel many emotions, including anger, fury, contempt, and hate. It can be one of the hardest things to do, but once you let go of your anger, you will find that you will be much more relaxed and that it will be easier for you to be happy. Instead of taking your anger out on your ex, release your anger and forgive your ex for anything they might have done. It will be in your family’s best interest for you to move on. Focus on Improving Communication with Your Ex You have probably heard it many times before, but communication is key, especially when it comes to co-parenting. Being a single parent is tough, but being a single parent who has to coordinate with an ex who they do not get along with is even tougher. Your kids (and you) will have an easier time with custody transitions if you and your ex can communicate effectively. Make a Point to Spend Quality Time with Your Children Though you may have your kids a majority of the time or even the same amount of time as your ex, it is easy to get caught up in the hustle and bustle of everyday life. Making time for your children is extremely important after a divorce because now every moment you spend with them is more precious than ever. Focus on your children and make sure that they feel loved and accepted -- more than they ever have before. Hire an Aurora, IL Divorce Attorney to Help You Through Your Divorce

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